"i write so that my handful of pebbles, cast daily into still waters, will produce a ripple. " —anne schroeder

i'm pissed off. i almost deleted my entire blog. instead i blocked it.
then i decided i would just get a new blog. so i did.
then i missed this blog.
so i erased that blog.
stared at this one for a little while.
redecorated it (because that always makes me feel better).

so i sat and thought about what i wanted to do. what the best decision would be for a gal in my situation.

it appears as if some people close to me do not like the fact that i am blogging. they are worried about me. worried that a crazy person, who will have all of my information once they read this, will pop in my life and do rotten things to me, i guess. in the conversation as to why the blog thing "isn't a good idea," the question was also raised: "well, what if your friends and family don't want you to write about them. what if they don't want their lives written about on your blog." i think this is a very valid question. i also think this is a large reason as to why people aren't so fond of my blogging. this question is something i have discussed at great lengths in college writing classes. the role of the reader, who is also the subject. i'm too aggravated to write more about this, and unfortunately, couldn't find the quote i wanted to include... so i am just including some randoms which stood out to me.

"If you love to write, then write. Don't let your goal be having a novel published, let your goal be enjoying your stories. However, if you finish your story and you want to share it, be brave about it. Don't doubt your story's appeal. If you are a good reader, and you know what is interesting, and your story is interesting to you, then trust in that. If I would have realized that the stories in my head would be as intriguing to others as they were to me, I would probably have started writing sooner. Believe in your own taste." -stephenie meyer

"it's not just the books under fire now that worry me. it is the books that will never be written. the books that will never be read. and all due to the fear of censorship. as always, young readers will be the real losers." -judy blume

"A writer is a person who cares what words mean, what they say, how they say it. Writers know words are their way towards truth and freedom, and so they use them with care, with thought, with fear, with delight. By using words well they strengthen their souls. Story-tellers and poets spend their lives learning that skill and art of using words well. And their words make the souls of their readers stronger, brighter, deeper." — Ursula K. Le Guin

"A good writer refuses to be socialized. He insists on his own version of things, his own consciousness. And by doing so he draws the reader’s eye from its usual groove into a new way of seeing." -bill barich

"We are important and our lives are important, magnificent really, and their details are worthy to be recorded. This is how writers must think, this is how we must sit down with pen in hand. We were here; we are human beings; this is how we lived. Let it be known, the earth passed before us. Our details are important. Otherwise, if they are not, we can drop a bomb and it doesn't matter. . . Recording the details of our lives is a stance against bombs with their mass ability to kill, against too much speed and efficiency. A writer must say yes to life, to all of life: the water glasses, the Kemp's half-and-half, the ketchup on the counter. It is not a writer's task to say, "It is dumb to live in a small town or to eat in a café when you can eat macrobiotic at home." Our task is to say a holy yes to the real things of our life as they exist – the real truth of who we are: several pounds overweight, the gray, cold street outside, the Christmas tinsel in the showcase, the Jewish writer in the orange booth across from her blond friend who has black children. We must become writers who accept things as they are, come to love the details, and step forward with a yes on our lips so there can be no more noes in the world, noes that invalidate life and stop these details from continuing." -natalie goldberg

""Trust in what you love, continue to do it, and it will take you where you need to go.”" -natalie goldberg

"Be what you would seem to be - or, if you'd like it put more simply - never imagine yourself not to be otherwise than what it might appear to others that what you were or might have been was not otherwise than what you had been would have appeared to them to be otherwise." — Lewis Carroll